Let's start with, what is "Vocalism"?
As per the dictionary:-
vocalism/ˈvəʊk(ə)lɪz(ə)m/noun
The use of the voice or vocal organs in speech.
It seems simple and easy for many of us, like why even talk about it... Isn't it something any person does since birth, even if it's for just crying. You are right.
However, as we grow up, from an infant to child, then land into teenage and finally adulthood knocks the door, we learn or at least try to manage our conversations.
The ability & power of any human being, to speak is conditioned, modulated, influenced and controlled over all these years. Therefore we suppress ourselves in many situations.
Now many of the people say silence is golden, or it's better to ignore certain talks, any conflicts because they've been taught to do so. I'm sure whoever taught them this wished well, so no offence.
However, have you ever came across the moments when you felt like - I wish I spoke up, I should have raised my concern, I lost the opportunity because I didn't participate well, I should have stood up for myself or those arguments you've had in your head for hours, and when you couldn't answer some people back while they ridiculed or insulted you. Do you relate with these feelings?
We all have been there, and have paid the price of silence instead of facing the consequences of Vocalism, but this needs to change for good.
Do you agree? Haven't your inner self jiggled you all these times? Your self respect wanted to stand and you let her down? Felt like trash for being treated like one?
The issue was not you feeling this way, real issue was realisation & regret that you didn't stand up, didn't speak up and didn't take any action when you could or should have. The only way to challenge this and step up our game is "courage", yes that is exactly what is required. My personal belief is that if they're not ashamed of doing unethical things, then why should we be scared to speak up.
Trust me I know this, I've been through it all since childhood. I felt like a complete failure many times in life, not because I wasn't capable but because I kept quiet through disrespect, injustice and bullying. Therefore I'm sharing this with you today.
I was one of the best & bright students in school, was loved by my teachers, making my parents proud. Life was really good & rewarding, however I had a so called "best friend" but her behaviour was like of "worst enemy", for example belittling me, jealous of my high scores, making fun of my wheatish complexion, she used to make me feel I'm poor as my parents were working, made fun of food I brought from home. She also taught me how to steal money, yes she did. Today I understand that she was narcissist and racist, I was too young to understand and didn't even realise it was wrong, I never understood how she got that toxic nature, I did understand that her parents left her for whatever reasons but such damaged people go out and damage the world, how sad & disgusting.
Then I was moved to a different school in middle of the session, trust me it's the most tragic thing happened in my life. I was no longer a topper, was bullied, insulted, made fun of and rarely spoke up. I didn't even know how to? Even if I wanted to complaint, the teachers were biased. Only I know how alone, disgusted, abandoned, failed I felt and I would make plans to run away in my head every single night.
However I am blessed to have such parents who are no less than army generals, they would remind me to be the best and the rest will follow, so I focused more on my studies, learning new skills - I knew whole MS office, HTML, internet just when I was 12 and these were not so common, read books apart from my academics, improvised my communication though continued to be an average student and introvert, I was still quiet to whatever happened around. I felt like a punch bag every single day of my teenage years.
The sad part was that this continued as my behaviour even when I did my higher studies. Despite I was awarded for "Excellence in Academics", I was still the one with bottled up grudge, fear & negativity, even in early & crucial years of my career, we all know what we go through as freshers at work. By the way, relatives were no less and the list of events is endless so let it be.
The silver lining was that I got few good friends, I mean they meant well for me irrespective of what others said or did. I truly owe to those people, at least at that stage of my life, they were my little ecstacy from the trauma.
I'm not looking for any sympathy but wanted to share how we all are conditioned to tolerated all the bullshit, I mean how many times we've heard our souls screaming "what the hell?" but we don't take any action.
I realised that some of the reasons we were silent are:-
- We don't want to be a complaint box
- We don't want to trouble our loved ones
- We don't realize how this was damage us internally untill we see things otherwise
- We think we are a good person so it's better to go through this
- People won't like us if we answer them back *how naive of us, if they would have liked you, they wouldn't have damaged you, right?
This "silence" impacts us badly, this is purely basis my own experience and I really wish it is different for you.
Many of times, we're treated as dumb & weak, feel inferior to others despite knowledge & experience, don't feel like going out, we get prone to people disrespecting us, unable to fight unethical situations, feel like a failure & doormat.
This needs to STOP! Take it as high alert situation as you really got to stand up & decide how you want to be treated.
This is a damage to us & we are responsible for it. So challenge yourself to overcome this by being vocal, it's addictive once you authorise yourself with power of "Vocalism".
I understand that no one supported you or stood for you when you expected & that's exactly the reason why you need to stand for yourself. Go ahead, take this challenge, don't wait any longer, speak the truth, the exploiters would be scared of you the day you start confronting and it's my own experience.
People who stand for themselves are strong, and the ones who stand for others are stronger. So start this with yourself today!
The day you stand up for yourself & others using Vocalism at it's best.. would be the day of liberation, believe me!
Wish you all the best 🙂
Comments
Post a Comment